The death of our love ones is one of the most agonizing experiences that we can have. Most people remember their love ones by celebrating the important days for them when they are still alive. Some people pray for and wish that they are now in a better place.
How do atheists remember their love ones?
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I dont think atheism makes remembering a loved one any different. You remember the good things about them and also feel sadness for now having them around. The only difference is that religious people have total faith in meeting them again someday. And no one can be sure of this.I cant deny an afterlife just as much as i cant prove it.
When some close to us dies i guess we all experience the same grieving. My mom died long time ago and i still remember her teachings, the only difference i have from theist is that i am not sure if i will ever see her again ...
I believe that good people have eternal rest because the essence that is left grants that peace in the afterlife if there is one. If there is none, then no harm is done to those that deserved happiness after death. I believe the soul could be something real. I would never be so stupid as to deny something I cannot explain. Just like a religious person can be dumb enough to say they are 100% certain of heaven when they have no idea how to logically explain such things.
My stand is agnostic but I would never deny the existence of god and the human soul. I just question the explanations I have been given so far about them. So in my book, if there is a god, but he plays no role in the destiny of humanity or the world we live in.
PS: I believe that any self respecting intelligent atheist would never dare to say they are sure there is no god. Unlike religious people who dare claim total certainty over things they can't even comprehend.
God is a topic that no one can really explain as well as the afterlife. For religious people who are saying they know God yet do terrible things to others are dumb and hypocrite people. The most important things is that we must do good things so whether there is or there is no afterlife, we will be at peace.
Obviously, atheists mourn just like anyone else. Regardless of where a person goes when they die, they are not here with us and that fact hurts.
I personally believe that they are now done with their body, and with the pressures of their life, and so obviously they have found peace as nothing can bother them now :) Everything that they were had affected the world around them, and their matter and energy is free to go where it is needed. If they were good people, they have given us a wonderful example to inspire us. If they were bad people, we have no choice but to forgive them (the term "beating a dead horse" comes from somewhere, lol) and acknowledge that they can do no further harm.
So as atheists, are you going to pray or talk to the souls of your departed loved ones? Do atheist somehow hope that they will see their dead relative or friends once again?
lol, no. Chances are they wouldn't recognize me if I saw them again anyway, or vice versa. If physics is truly an indication of how the world works, then the odds of enough of my being carrying over into a single life force to concretely recognize another person from a previous partial incarnation are slim at very best.
Sometimes I pass someone in the street that looks oddly familiar, and I can tell by the way they look at me that they think I look familiar too. That's pretty much as good as it needs to get in my opinion.
So as atheists, 1) are you going to pray or talk to the 2) souls of your departed loved ones? Do atheist somehow hope that they 3) will see their dead relative or friends once again?
1) No.
2) Don't believe any such thing exists.
3) No.
I try to focus on those who are left, and draw solace from the memories that my relatives who have died enjoyed their lives as much as they could. When I'm gone I don't want any hand-ringing, I don't believe you can honour the dead or respect them, it's too late, treat them as well as possible now, because soon enough they and you will be gone. Death is the price of admission for this ride, it's absurd to worry about it.
I think the possibility of an afterlife is not something to completely discard. We will see whe we die.
Though we can never disprove the afterlife, I think it's actually beneficial for us to discard it. If we assume that there is no afterlife, then that truly allows us to live this one life we have to the fullest.
Speaking of which, I feel that remembering the dead is the closest thing we have to an afterlife. There may not be a physical afterlife, but the way in which I think we live on after death is in the memories of our loved ones and those we made an impression on. Again, we should live this life as best we can to make a lasting impression on our, friends, our family, our society.
"I think the possibility of an afterlife is not something to completely discard."
I disagree, there is no evidence for this, and I find the idea we survive our own deaths in any meaningful way absurd, nor would I have it any other way. Life is all the more precious because it is finite. We'll see nothing when we die, just as we saw nothing prior to being born. My brain is what experiences reality, before it did this I experienced nothing, and when it dies I will stop experiencing anything.
"How do atheists remember their love ones?"
i just remember them, so whats the problem with that?
@Rose: "The death of our love ones is one of the most agonizing experiences that we can have. "
This just isn't true. A whole lot of grief and the way grief is dealt with has to do with 1. Your view of life and death. 2. The age of the person who dies. 3. The circumstances of the death.
The more you know about death and dying the less sever it becomes. We are generally unfortunate in Western culture as we have removed ourselves from the natural process of death. I am not saying that death is a jolly event; however, there is no reason at all to tag it with "agonizing." It just does not have to be that way.
HOW DO WE REMEMBER:
With our brains. There is no set way to remember anyone. I personally have photographs, videos, and friends that I can talk to who remember the friends that have passed on. We can talk together and remember the good times.
Here is the reality. I ran a company similar to Goodwill. Families would call us when their Grandfather or Grandmother passed away and they needed all the belongings removed from a home so it could be sold. We would walk into the place and gut it. Beds, tables, chairs, clothes, photographs, papers, personal journals, anything and everything that was important to that living human being. We would take what could be sold and burn the rest. When you are gone, you are gone. When those that remember you are gone, you are even more gone.
We remember those we loved in our own ways. At our own times. With our own friends. We don't wait for some holiday or ritual to remind us to remember them. We remember by simply remembering.
Rose: "are you going to pray or talk to the souls of your departed loved ones? "
If you are going to talk about a soul, you have to define what in the hell you are talking about.,
As for Prayer? Are you completely unaware of the research done on intercessory prayer? It works no better than pure chance.
FROM THE PEW RESEARCH CENTER
"Prayers offered by strangers had no effect on the recovery of people who were undergoing heart surgery, a large and long-awaited study has found."
" it is the most scientifically rigorous investigation of whether prayer can heal illness, the study, begun almost a decade ago and involving more than 1,800 patients, has for years been the subject of speculation."
Not only that, but, if people knew they were being prayed for, they did demonstrably worse. Apparently the act of praying for someone makes them think there condition is more serious than it is and it negatively effects their recovery.
http://www.pewresearch.org/about/
@Rose
Regardless of one's beliefs, or lack of them, I feel ALL persons remember their dead.
18 May
07 June
22 February
For me, the three MOST important dates. All other dates can, as the saying goes, Go To Hell.
07 June - My wife's birthday. Usually remembered by drinking a bottle of cabernet sauvignon (wife's favorite type of wine) with some tomato basil Triscuits and smoked gouda cheese (wife's favorite) and green olives stuffed with garlic cloves.
22 February - Twin daughter's birthday. Usually remembered by quite contemplation. They were 16 when killed, just three months after getting their driver's licenses. They never got to see life as they should have...
18 May - Double remembrance. Our wedding anniversary. Adversely, it is also the anniversary of my family's death. YES! The accident that killed my family happened on exactly the same day as our 18th wedding anniversary. This one is usually remembered with both happiness and extreme depression. Usually, the depressive pain is so great, I just usually get drunk to the point of coma. Pay for it the next day, but it helps in numbing the pain some.
Reiteratively, ALL people remember their dead in basically the same way. Through remembrance.
rmfr
My condolences arakish. I am speechless really, just wanted to offer my sympathies. I have lost people in my life of course, and some quite young, but nothing as traumatic as this, again please accept my sympathies.
Thank you. Condolences and sympathies greatly appreciated and accepted.
Guess you never read my "Soul Shatter" sharing I posted here? That is perfectly OK. Not everyone would since it was a loonnnggg... post.
However, I have gone back and compiled that sharing with the responses I received, responses I made, and couple of "blogs" I later added.
You can download it here (PDF): Dropbox Link.
Again, thanks. Although it may not seem to, all support I get helps. Funny thing is that I seem to get better support from atheists than the theists.
rmfr
I have a question? Why in the hell do the dead need to be remembered - they are dead. We all do it but any ritual or ceremony is for the living, not for the dead. Do you really think the dead care one way or the other? Really?
I live as if I will not be around tomorrow. Each day I try to show my loved ones I do love them, and each day I cherish them. When the end comes, there is nothing I can do. But for today, I can.
Wisely Said!
One way that atheists remember the dead is by digging up 5 year old threads and responding to posters who have not been on the forum for years.
HAHAH...i know right...i brought this thread just to change the ambiance of the debate forum, and to refresh the past short replies and comments....
and others really took it seriously..hahah