PTSD, A Minute or Two

I have a though, am a lifelong sufferer with C-PTSD, complex added out of necessity per guidelines.
I feel the concept of it is simply that you have a life-shattering experience and are unwell due to having a level of fear so total you lose the safety that the event had on your life.
Losing the secure fact that love exists. Not love but the entire construct of the existence of that word in and on our lives.
Gone.
How do you bake beans, give a shit about anything when loves complete white against the black of love!
Men, military, we are basically pitted against every other man at anytime, anywhere.
So, I think “fuck I’m a badass with a gun and I hate them because for men there’s only hate enough to eradicate, are right now ok with and everyone one of our heroes. 100% white heroes from here forward.
When that construct loses the calming lie we are totally ok with walking around with today.
Losing control/impermeability to death/the realization of death’s complete finality/a mistake. Even losing “too cool not to dwell. We are supremely fragile!
Why do so many post the complete crushing concept of War?
Relationships violently gone horribly wrong?
Being the only Human able to hear you scream, alone in an apartment?
Being able to do our normal lies as we act impermeable at work, home, life or alone are so unimportant you don’t have the energy or will to put them on.
Please remain healthy to be able to help those important to you.
Evaluate your list and realize “important” to you is inhumanly short!
Sometimes the concept surrounding the lie, “You are not alone!”, is all that will make later happen!

Good luck out there